J’ai Envie D’un Peu De Silence

He thinks I am calmer now compared to few months back. I asked for further explanation. He explained “from your posts, you seem calmer”. I laughed. I am not calmer. I probably have more drama in my life than few months ago when life seemed a bit boring. Yet there is this thing that is keeping me from writing about it in this blog. I feel and for the first time that I lost the connection I had once with this blog.

One thought all the time: Send me back.

Mr. Psycho, go away.

I miss them.

She passed away. I felt so scared I got in the denial phase and refused to attend the funeral. Instead I went out with my friends. I haven’t spoken to her mum yet. I feel bad!

The crush is gone.

17 Responses to “J'ai Envie D'un Peu De Silence”


  1. 1 Purgatory May 20th, 2007 at 10:39 am

    I was thinking the same way about you yesterday, interesting that someone else thought the same.

  2. 2 t-j May 20th, 2007 at 2:59 pm

    Hi ana 9arle kathaa youm o im viewing ur blog.. o shift il comments o mdre I wana say something bs atmnaa ine ma ajr7eej or a7rjeej..

    Ana ma kint mitwgaa3 ina bnat ilq8 9ar 3ndoohm ina having a boyfriend its that easy badoon ma yar3oon ilmojtaam3 or 7ta ahlhooom !! even having sex !!
    y3ne lash esh7gaaa chthe !! mn ele agraa eb ur blog o mn il comments 3la ur posts ashoof ina everyboday talking about kissing boyfriends o sex !! o china shy 3adee!!

    a7es ina hal shy 3ayeb o `3laa6 .. sorry bs kint badizlech email bs ma kinty 7a6aa ur email,, faa kint abe agool rayey eb loud voice ehehe.. o mdre wayn a76 my comment faa I did post it ehne. o sorry again law 3dayt e7doode

  3. 3 kila_ma6goog May 20th, 2007 at 4:43 pm

    did anyone said the word SEX in here??

    where ? please show me?

  4. 4 shopa May 20th, 2007 at 4:51 pm

    purg,
    tsk tsk

    t-j,
    لي متى نقص على روجنا ونعيش الدور إن إحنا عايشين في مجتمع مثالي؟ من جيل اجدادنا وهم يحبون ويتعرفون بس كل شي بالخش والدس
    I don’t think we are hurting our society when we openly talk about dating, we are being more honest with ourselves that’s all.
    and FYI, my email is shopaq8eya@gmail.com

    KM,
    أنا شكيت بروحي قمت قريت البوست مرة مرتين وثلاث ليما الحين ماكو شي

  5. 5 Judy Abbott May 20th, 2007 at 10:02 pm

    i hope you are not talking about the same girl who died from cancer..
    because if it is her.. i actually didn’t go either.. instead i ran until i couldn’t feel my feet.

  6. 6 EniGma May 21st, 2007 at 6:17 am

    Allah yer7amha,, whoever she is.

    t-j: would you rather have things bel khash wedas? At least when things are in the open you can do something about them, not when its deeply underground.

  7. 7 shopa May 21st, 2007 at 6:39 am

    Judy,
    ;*

    EniGma,
    allah yer7mha

  8. 8 Delicately Realistic May 21st, 2007 at 9:33 am

    haw?!

    il7ajiya ily fog shfeha?
    never read about kissing and sex on ur blog!
    o b3dain this is an anonymous personal space….u and anyone can write whatever u may plz.

    ifff
    tadren baskit many mkamla

  9. 9 t-j May 21st, 2007 at 9:58 am

    km ,, shopa
    sorry law thaygt a7d bs hal shy kint mthayg mna o 7bayt agool rayey..

    ama about il sex, fee post inty 7a6etaa 3n (A&X and y)shy chthe manee mithkeer blthab6 bs ina x slept m3aa y faa u takling about sex..

    Ana mo`9eed ina a7d ykoon 3nda a relationship bs kel shy eb e7dood o il relationship etkoon hadifhaa il zawaaj,, bs il girls nowadays talking about having a boyfriend china shy 6abe3ee 7ta badoon ma yakon il hadiif mn warhaa ilzawaaj ,,,

    9aar etha w7da ent`haaat 3lagt`haa eb w7ed, 3la 6ool she`s looking for a new relationship!!
    O now 9ar ina ilbint having sex m3a her boyfriend shy 3ade !!.

    Y3ne wala shy ya7eez bl 5a6eer ina bnat il q8 9araaw chthe.. o giltay ina gabeel kaan bl 5ash o ildaas bs ma kaaanw yatjroo2n ina il3laaga et3dee e7dooodha.. bs ham gabel can fee cases ina relationships 3daat e7dodha bs ma knaat kather now o ma knaat thaah`raa 3amaaa nafs al7een,, o hath ilshy ile ya5wiiif

  10. 10 t-j May 21st, 2007 at 10:07 am

    Forget to mention, tara ana mo theed or ga3ed agool lash u guys talking about it bl 3x I know ina hal shy mawjood o ina u guys talking openly about it .. o ana bs gilet my opinion,, cuz mist`3reb ina why hal shy 9aar so easy

  11. 11 hanan May 21st, 2007 at 5:39 pm

    shopa. 3atham allah ajrich. And I hope you regain your ties to your blog soon :*

    t-j. You seem mostly concerned with girls talking about their boyfriends. Does that mean you’re ok with boys talking about their girlfriend? I hope for your sake inna your argument goes both ways.

  12. 12 Dishevelled May 22nd, 2007 at 1:33 am

    t-j, there’s a different between “shy 9ar so easy” and it was always easy and people refused to openly talk about it. And honestly, its human nature to want/love and be wanted and loved back. I think there are far greater “bad” or “wrong” things a person can do than having a boyfriend, it is after all a personal choice in which the girl didn’t harm anyone, and if she did it would have only been herself, if you want to see it that way.

    Personally I wouldn’t care much if i knew that a girl has a boyfriend and slept with him as ilmo3amala towards me. What’s the point of knowing someone who’s the virgin mary when it comes to relationships and everything that goes with it, but gossips like there’s no tomorrow, is two faced, a hypocrite, has an attitude problem, etc etc.

    What I’m trying to say is I hope you don’t judge girls on the basis of their personal choices regarding their personal life and rather judge their character and the way they treat others. In the end that’s what matters the most. As time goes by you won’t remember what people did or didn’t do, but you’re always remember how they made you feel. =)

  13. 13 t-j May 22nd, 2007 at 8:02 am

    hanan:
    my argument goes for both M/F.

    Dishevelled:
    its as u said human nature to love, and for me there is nothing wrong with a honest relationship but in one condition inha ma et3dee ile7dood (u know what I mean by inha ma et3de il7dood).

  14. 14 shopa May 22nd, 2007 at 1:55 pm

    t-j,
    define limits!
    منو اللي يحدد شنو الحدود؟
    ممكن اللي إنتي تشوفينه يكون فيه تعدي للحدود يكون عند شخص ثاني عادي

  15. 15 kila_ma6goog May 22nd, 2007 at 5:02 pm

    صديقنا العزيز تي جاي

    شوف ربما يكون اغلب الموجودين رافضين الافكار الخلاعية و الاباحية و هذا شي موجود بالكويت و البيئة الكويتية العامة

    لكن المشكلة تكمن بالمنطق الرمادي و هو عندما تقول انا مو ضد الحب لكن لازم ينتهي بزواج او الحب زين لكن بحدود و من هالكلام اللي للأسف نعم كل واحد فينا يردده و يقوله لكن كلنا عارفين ان بالواقع هالشي مو موجود

    الحب او العلاقة بين البنت و الولد موجودة و ستظل موجودة

    الهدف منها زواج؟ منو يقدر يضمن انهم يتزوجون او لا؟ ان كنت بتشوف النوايا فدخلنا بمنطقة رمادية اخرى

    حدود؟

    ايضا منطقة رمادية كبيرة و تحديد الحدود بالحب اصعب من تحديد حدود فلسطين و اسرائيل

    لذلك الواحد يقصر على عمره الطريج و يسكت و يقول كل واحد و كيفه و يعرف مصلحته

    و شكرا

  16. 16 Delicately Realistic May 22nd, 2007 at 5:08 pm

    t-j

    Before i begin id like to state that i too do not believe in sex before marriage and that i to believe that relationships should not begin unless the intention is for future marriage.

    That said…..

    I think we live in a free country and a free world.

    Just as long noone hurts another human being intentionally I think its safe to say that we are ALL free to do what we please.
    Whether it is right or wrong.
    It all boils down to personal choice and inevitably personal freedom.

    Now tell me….why are we having this discussion?
    What gives you the right to form an opinion or judge others?

    If you do not like it, then dont do it.
    If you do not like it, teach your kids, family and loved ones not to do it.
    If you do not like the people who act that way, then dont interact with them.
    And keep ur kids and loved ones away from them.

    O khalasna!

    Khalich ib 7alich ya 7ilwa o malich shogul bil nas.

  17. 17 Alia May 26th, 2007 at 9:39 am

    calmer?? I don’t know .. I just know that you’re prettier
    & BTW: yellow does look good on you

    وعظم الله أجرج
    ;*

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